Mochi: (Almost an Epic Fail)

So... I kinda love mochi.  

Not this kind of mochi.  I mean...yeah, I kinda love this kind of mochi too, but for different reasons. 

A lot of people in a lot of countries (not just in Asia) love Mochi.  And the evidence stands that the internet also loves mochi - if the dizzying array of recipes is anything to be believed.  Hawaii (being that great blender of many delightful things east and west - and yes I include Spam in that list) seems to have several interesting recipes, including red bean paste rolled around strawberry. 

When E and I went on our adventure to Saigon Market, we got some mochi, because I raved about it, and E had seen plenty watching anime, and we were both curious as to how she would take it.  It's really a texture thing, and the idea that most Asian sweets aren't all that sweet - okay, well that was a broad generalization, because Filipino stuff is often ridiculously sweet, and then there's Thai tea, and boba tea and... yeah, I'll have to come back to that.  Oh how I miss Boba.  

I was saying: Mochi.  
The mochi we got was all lovely in little paper wrappers and flavored with black seasame, peanut butter, and red bean paste (not all together).  It was lovely.  E liked the peanut butter, I liked the seasame, and we both like the red bean, although if you've read E's post on manju, you'd know that sweet red beans...took some getting used to.  

Like this mochi.  Eerily similar to the box we purchased.

Since the mochi was such a hit, I figured, why not get some rice flour so we can make our own.  Whereupon the rice flour sat in E's house for several weeks while we both ran off and had other adventures.  I came back several weeks later to visit and lo and behold.  Forgotten rice flour!  E is currently doing a summer theatre gig, which leaves me up to all sorts of mischeif during the daylight hours (unusual for a theatre person, I know), so I had the GENIUS idea to you know, just sorta make up some mochi for when she got off work.  Obviously it's easy.  I don't even have to get out a huge mortar and pestle and grind the flour.  

The recipes all said put the stuff in the microwave for 10 minutes to cook it, but I scorn microwaves for more reasons than one- so I figured, hey, it's not like they had microwaves in feudal Japan or insert Asian country here- before they got electricity and... microwaves - so it'll be fine on the stove.  

One recipe noted I should knead water and mochi flour until it's like playdough.  And then add the sugar syrup. 

Chocolate and Plain mochi dough.  Appetizing, no?

Have you ever made sugar syrup?  Probably not.  It's not really HARD per-se, but it takes patience, a virtue in which I am lacking.  So I was like, meh, I'll just use sugar, blend it in, it'll cook while it heats.  
Mind you - I AM capable of following a recipe, under duress, but often my confidence in my improvisation skills is a little much.  

So I made up some mochi dough, and then place little bits of peanut butter filling inside (cause, well, that's what we had on hand).  It took quite a while (read: two batches) to get the right amount of everything and then the right amount of rolling and pressure to make them look moderately like mochi.  

There was also this conversation: 
S'ra: Aaargh - why is this not working?!?  They are HUGE.  And not pretty, they're like -eerugh. 
E: Maybe it just takes practice? 
S'ra: Maybe, but still! 
E: Or maybe you just need tiny little Asian hands?  
E and S'ra look at each other. 
E: Oh wait... nevermind. 


Then I figured, you steam rice cakes and rice balls, and other stuff, right?   So we'll just steam them in the bamboo steamer until they're done.

 
So... I did that. 
They looked beautiful. 

They were hard as little bouncy balls you play Jacks with.  

They were kinda like, when you get your gelatin prosthetic ratio off and you cook it too long in the microwave and then you have ka-boingy little scars instead of things that look like actual scars...  Nevermind, that probably doesn't help you.  

So... back to the drawing board the next day. 
Unawares of the trauma befalling her kitchen, E went blissfully off to Summer Shakespeare (for the given value of bliss) and I decided perhaps it might behoove me to look up reicpes specifically for COOKED ON A STOVE mochi.  

See what I mean?

Upon finding a couple, I once again decided to live on the wild side by "melting" the lump of leftover mochi dough that I had not steamed and adding water to it until it... sorta-kinda- looked like goo - I mean - glue.  I didn't quite get that glossy - puffy- kinda like playdough thing to it, but it did look like if I cooked it anymore it was going to turn into some serious adhesive.  

Practically ready for Super-Sloppy-Double-Dare.  Now with 2nd-Degree burns!

 If you ever need really awesome slime... rice flour is your friend.  All you need is some green food coloring and perhaps cooling it to not a scalding temperature. 

Because that stuff was HOT.  How are you supposed to mold it into shapes, good heavens!  I thought I had pretty tough little fingers, but it probably didn't help that I'm on a "S'ra will learn a new instrument and built up some calluses this summer" kick. 

So there was much finagling of the gloopy mess.  And adding of the peanut butter. 
And trying to get it to hold it's shape (less sucessful).  
And so it looked (vaugely) like mochi - 

Peanut Butter Fish, anyone?

 - and the texture and ka-boingy-ness was at the level of your earlobe.  I swear, that's what the honsestly helpful blog said: "If it feels kinda like the fleshy part of your earlobe, you're in good shape."  

Except now it's... kinda bland.  And not quite ka-boingy enough.  Instead of TOO ka-boingy.   

I still have the chocolate mochi dough and some flour left.  
Third time's a charm, right?